That's Rachel Waugh's term for the sort of did-not-finish (DNF) where you look like you're going to die. It's appropriate here!
The morning started okay - we left pretty much on time and it didn't take us too long to find Matt. We were supposed to drop our bags off at the workplace of Claire's friend, but we couldn't find it. We spent a lot of time going up and down the elevators before we got to the right place.
We caught a taxi over to a cafe called Jaspas near the start - I think it was in Sai Kung, but I'm not sure. We had enormous breakfasts of poached eggs, avocado and asparagus on Turkish and finished with banana pancakes.
We caught another taxi over to the registration area and promptly freaked out when Matt didn't have his HKID. It didn't matter though - we didn't need them, and I carried my passport for nothing. It was very hot, humid and sunny. Since I have arrived in Hong Kong, it has been mostly overcast, and the forecast was rain and cold, but it was not to be. I was very glad for my white shirt and cap and was amazed my team mates were all in dark colours.
The start line was horribly hot and it was good to get on the road. Ash was worried we were heading out too fast but it was very easy and breezy through that section. It wasn't until after we crossed the dam wall and started up the hills that I noticed the heat. It was like nothing I've experienced. It wasn't like Death Valley, where your sweat evaporates instantly - I was drenched in sweat after about five seconds of climbing. And the heat was on all sides - there was no breeze, and the heat was reflecting back up the rock stairs at me.
On the first big climb, my team mates pulled a long way ahead of me. At first I thought I was having asthma problems, but then I noticed my breathing was slow and regular, and my legs felt fine - I was just overheating. I really needed to cool off a bit but I couldn't even see my team mates ahead, so I pushed on. They waited for me at a pagoda half way up, but then moved off as soon as I got there, so I got no rest. Once we hit the top and started descending I felt a bit better (mostly because there was some shade) but I was having a bit of trouble distinguishing the steps and I found it much easier to keep up over the rocks and dirt.
When we came into the next checkpoint, Ash was feeling a bit crook and I was happy to slow down, although it was nice and cool down there. At this point, I should have emptied the Pocari Sweat out of my drink bladder and put water in - the sports drink was making me feel sick - but everyone was rushing out and the water was a bit short, so I just kept going.
Further along, as it started to get darker, I felt quite good and made good time up a climb. I was much better on anything that wasn't stairs, because I like to shorten my stride up hills. We flew down the other side, enjoying the cool and the easy going. But when we next started climbing I felt the heat close in on me again and I got very dizzy and couldn't walk in a straight line. It was a very odd feeling. I had a think about what I had eaten (a PowerBar Harvest and a Gel) and drunk (only a couple of litres) and was a bit worried. I felt that I needed to stop and get sorted out, get my gut working again. But once again my team was worried about their time - 18 hours or they didn't even care about finishing - so I kept going.
I really shouldn't have. I should have demanded a stop. By the time we were heading towards Checkpoint 4, my body was falling apart. I mean, my legs felt great and my asthma wasn't playing up, but I couldn't move in a straight line and I couldn't drink my fluids and I couldn't eat (though I was still trying). I took a stop with Matty for a while (I have no idea where) because I needed lots of salt and lots of water. I took a salt tablet and ate a lot of chips and drank the last of my water - leaving only the sports drink that was turning my stomach.
Over the next two hours or so, I took a toilet break almost every fifteen minutes, so I thought maybe I was overhydrated; but my urine smelled really strong, suggesting I was either dehydrated or my kidneys were packing it in. I really had no idea what was going on with my body or how to fix it, and I have never felt like that in an ultra before. I was really scared.
So when I got into Checkpoint 4 (at about 48km) I filled my bottles and then sat down on the grass and drank a lot of water and ate all the soup that was put in front of me. The others were not interested in carrying on as they were now on 24 hour pace. I think that is pretty good for a first-timer, and I also felt that sense of disgust at pushing on through a really dangerous situation, when I knew that if I had slowed down when I needed to, I would have been in before 22 hours for sure.
Then I got the shakes - really bad shakes that made it hard to get the soup into my mouth and didn't get better when I held the cup in two hands. That convinced me more than anything else that I shouldn't go on. Around this time my team mates realised just how sick I was. I refused to go to the medical tent because they didn't even have scales. I just wanted to know whether I had lost or gained weight so I could treat myself - my hands were puffy suggesting weight gain, but otherwise I looked more like dehydration - in the interim I decided to just go with salty soup. It seemed to make me feel better so I kept with it.
When we got home, I cleaned up my gear, had a shower and then ate a turkey sandwich and another serve of crisps. I drank a good amount of water and then went to bed. This morning I woke up feeling okay, so I am very glad that I stopped when I did. But I am very annoyed that I did not stop sooner, that I did not insist upon sitting and cooling down.
I guess locals just do not understand how the humidity affects your thermoregulation. I've done plenty of hills, plenty of sunlight, plenty of heat and plenty of humidity before - but not all at the same time. I did all the right things, trying to cool my body, but I just wasn't humidity efficient. I really needed to do my sauna training, like I did before Western States.
I didn't see much scenery because it was dark, and I didn't see much of my team because they were always so far ahead... but I will be continuing my sauna training in the future, and I will not do races in humid climates unless I am well acclimatised!